40 Outdated Wedding Traditions People Really Need to Stop Doing at Their Wedding

Traditionally, a father walks his daughter down the aisle before “handing her over” to her future husband. At this point, the father is “relieved” of all duties, and the wife is now the husband’s responsibility. Many aren’t aware of what this tradition entails.

A bride is a human, not an object to give away. The bride-to-be isn’t being traded for 10 cows. As an alternative, couples have requested people to bless the union. If you would rather walk alone, or with your mother, do it!

Whoever came up with “it’s bad luck to see the bride in her wedding dress before the actual wedding day” was going through something. It makes no sense to forbid the couple from seeing each other in the clothes they will be wearing for one of the most significant events of their lives.

For two people who have spent so much time together leading up to the big day, it doesn’t really make sense. What if the bride wants her husband’s opinion on her dress?

Weddings are where couples are celebrated, and single people are called out. Why make a whole section of people feel awkward for not having a significant other? On top of that, why ruin a perfect bouquet by tossing it arbitrarily in the air?

With the belief that whoever catches the flowers is the next one destined to walk down the aisle, a lot rides on this bouquet toss. Having a group of women fight over flowers is such a silly tradition.

Weddings are costly on their own, and then people throw in unnecessary expenses like wedding favors. Like most party favors, wedding favors are basically a collection of items that end up in the trash or at Goodwill sooner or later.

Let’s just be honest now – nobody is that invested in someone else’s wedding’s souvenirs. Instead of wasting money putting your monogram and wedding date on a random item, rather use it toward the honeymoon.

A wedding party consists of bridesmaids and groomsmen who are expected to accompany the couple every step of the way. While it may sound like a privilege to be included in someone’s big day like that, it’s actually just a lot of unnecessary pressure.

People in matching outfits have to stand next to the bride and groom and do what they say, as if they were their assistants. Your best friends should enjoy your wedding rather than worry if the flower girl got there on time!

Cake smashing is wrong for numerous reasons. Firstly, the cake itself took many hours to make and costs way more than it should. The same can be said for the bride’s dress and makeup, so why risk that all?

We get that you want to have fun and entertain your friends but that’s what the dancing is for. Smearing each other’s faces with frosting just seems very high school.

Having guests show up to your wedding isn’t harming anyone, so don’t fret about what they choose to wear. People’s eyes will be fixated on the bride because it’s her special day. Why restrict people from wearing white?

White is a classic choice when it comes to fancy attire. Also, if women want to wear pantsuits to a wedding, they should be welcome to do so. Everyone just needs to loosen up when it comes to traditions!

Most people get shy to dance in front of a large audience and shouldn’t be forced to do so just because it’s their wedding day. Remove the stress of going to dance lessons and rather enjoy some date nights.

The time and money spent on dance training could be spent on other activities that the couple actually like, or even toward the wedding event itself. It’s time to normalize enjoying weddings, not stressing out.

Despite its beauty, white can stain easily. Many people’s wardrobes don’t have one piece of crisp white attire due to this very reason. Also, once the wedding ceremony has been conducted, the couple will be sitting down to eat.

Moreover, traditionally, the color white signified the “purity” or abstinence of a woman before marriage. Unless you can handle it, steer clear of white. By wearing a white wedding dress, you’re more likely to stain it or just never wear it again.

For couples asking for presents instead of cash for their wedding, don’t shy away from asking for what you really need or want. If you have an existing set of silverware and plates, you don’t need an extra set of fine china simply because that’s a traditional wedding gift.

Cuteness gets old; convenience stays relevant. Ask for stuff you will use on a daily basis. Don’t deny yourself anything because of odd superstitions. A set of knives would be an excellent addition to the new kitchen!

We get it. A wedding is an exciting celebration. However, it doesn’t mean we have to start performing in acts that we would never otherwise. Such is the case for the cringe-worthy flashmob dancing that takes place at the reception dinner.

You might not be able to sense the awkward tension in the air when you are the bride/groom or dancing with the party, but as a guest watching, you’ll feel it.

Many of these ancient wedding traditions carried a lot of value when they were first practiced. It’s a mystery why people still choose to carry them on. A lot of the older norms aren’t relevant anymore. Perhaps tweaking one or two can make them usable again.

That being said, many couples blindly follow these traditions without knowing the true meaning behind them. One such is a bride having a maid of honor while the groom has a best man. Why can’t we change that up?

Unfortunately, modern weddings are less about the celebration of two individuals coming together and more about a showcase of wealth. But surely the focus should be on their love and marital vows?

That way, the happy couple can keep their money in a savings account and use it for a better purpose later. Buying a property, investing in stocks or saving up to have children sounds a lot smarter than spending your pennies all for one day.

Limiting your wedding to two standard color palettes is a rubbish belief. If you are a fan of colors, express yourself! It is your wedding, after all. Let your creative juices flow and display all the color tones that match your personality.

We recommend selecting complementary colors that do not clash but rather uplift the entire mood of the event. Sometimes, the more, the merrier. As an example, look how beautiful this bride’s colorful wedding dress looks!

The tradition of bridesmaid dresses comes from 19th century England. Back then, the bridesmaids used to dress identical to the bride. By the advent of the 20th century, bridesmaid dresses contrasted the brides.

Bridesmaids are their own people, thus not every dress will look good on everyone, and not everyone is comfortable with every outfit. Choosing a standard color is a better idea than making everyone dress the same.

If you thought the groom and bride’s first look was weird, the father-daughter one would not impress you either. Generally, fathers watch their daughters grow up for their whole life, with notable exceptions applied.

We don’t see the difference between that and seeing her in her wedding dress. Sure, it can be emotional seeing your little daughter all grown up and getting married, but you aren’t waving away your fatherly rights? In 2022, most couples will live together before marriage, so this tradition is a moot to start with.

The day of a woman’s wedding will very likely be stressful, overwhelming, and nerve-wracking. Naturally, her friends and family try to make it easier for her by tending to all her needs.

Some brides, however, are disgustingly entitled and act as if everyone should be at their beck and call because “it’s their special day.” Some people take this a little far and turn into demanding divas who think they can talk down to those around them.

People opt out of weddings for several reasons. Perhaps they have work that day; they couldn’t find a date and don’t want to attend alone, or they cannot afford the whole excursion. Nowadays, people are somewhat open about the gifts they want and more often than not, it comes with expensive taste.

For guests that do not attend, the mandatory clause of still sending a gift is outrageous. Thanks to this backward belief, everyone who receives a wedding invite automatically starts stressing.

Being a bride is definitely a special role but it shouldn’t be confused with an acting role. Actors often require stand-ins for numerous reasons such as camera blocking or lighting setups but the same cannot be said for a bride.

So, this silly superstition that bans brides from walking down the aisle before the ceremony is a total money waster. Sure, you can be a perfectionist who wants things done right but it still doesn’t explain this.

The glass-clinking tradition doesn’t always win the popular vote. For those of you scratching your heads, this is when guests bang their silverware against their glasses to cheer on the newly-married couple to kiss. How awkward? Also, this is more dangerous than it seems.

People are known to be quite inebriated at wedding events, so getting them to break glass is basically asking for an accident to happen. That is why many brides have come up with cute alternatives. For example, getting guests to place coins in a kissing jar.

Believe it or not, it is not obligatory to get married at a religious place like a church, synagogue or mosque. Marriages have been limited to entirely religious ceremonies, but they are much more than that.

Recognized by the government, married couples also bear tax benefits. Remember that religion is only one aspect of a wedding. There is no reason for you to get married at a holy site unless you are somewhat religious. Otherwise, go for a destination wedding or a location that holds a deep meaning to you!

It is believed that the father of the bride is supposed to shoulder all the monetary burdens of the wedding. Maybe that’s how it was back in the olden days but it’s now 2022 and this no longer makes sense. Why should such a massive responsibility be put on one set of parents?

Obviously, finances are different for everyone and therefore, each wedding should be handled accordingly. If the bride and groom can afford to buy the bulk of the wedding, that’s totally okay too. Couples need to realize that they can base their wedding arrangements on what suits them.

Releasing doves, butterflies or any other precious animal after a wedding ceremony is just unnecessary and bordering on cruel. If couples really want to be extra and enjoy the notion of liberating something into the sky, why not do so with balloons or lanterns?

In fact, you can really get creative with modernizing this tradition. For example, you could hand out eco-friendly bubble mixtures or wildflower seed bombs. We hope one of these alternatives appeal to you, because it’s time to get with the 21st-century picture.

The practice of carrying bouquets is rooted in antiquity. Ancient Romans, Egyptians, and Greeks used to carry fragrant spices and herbs to ward off evil eyes during weddings. Flowers also have a beautiful meaning in this sense because they symbolize a new chapter of happiness, fertility, and fidelity.

Having said that, not every bride likes flowers. In fact, many could be allergic. Traditions are meant to change over the years and adapt to the newer standards of living. Maybe the bride wants to carry feathers or a lantern. To cut a long story short, pick what you want on your special day.

Live flowers can set you back hundreds and thousands of dollars, based on the size of your ceremony. And yes, having real flowers is beautiful to look out but they also wither and die just days later.

This is where fake flowers come in handy. They can be repurposed and reused. You can use them to decorate your home later or donate them to someone else. Not only are they cheaper, but they’re also more practical and convenient.

It’s not necessary for the wedding rings to match as you are two individuals who probably have your own style preferences. Couples can have different tastes in metals, stones, and so on.

Having the same wedding band also doesn’t help resemble that the couple has a deep connection. Obviously, if the soon-to-be husband and wife want to don matching bling, then that’s okay too.

“Bridal Chorus” by Wagner is that one quintessential wedding song you are bound to hear at every ceremony. As many couples of the past chose to make their relationship official to this song, new-age couples often still feel the pressure to comply.

Just so you know, this song doesn’t have to be played at your wedding. Instead, go for a song that holds sentimental value for both of you. That way, you know it will be special. You can even play an upbeat, fun song to beat the nerves!

This goes along the lines of a father walking his daughter down the aisle. The bride-to-be is a grown woman who can make her own decisions, right? She might want her father to be happy with her decision, but that doesn’t mean she requires her permission for it.

A father doesn’t own his daughter in the same way that a husband doesn’t own his wife. Ringing up the bride’s father for a friendly chat in order to make sure he blesses the union is a different and respectable gesture.

While veils are elegant and sophisticated, they aren’t for everyone. Brides have walked down the aisle with tiaras, flower crowns, and nothing but a small pin in their hair. Veils hold some value in orthodox wedding culture, but there is no reason to hold onto those now.

Originally, brides were dolled up with a veil to showcase an “untouched and modest maiden.” Again, problematic… Also, if the veil is long, you will need an extra person to help you so that you don’t accidentally trip.

When it comes to getting dressed for the special day, brides don’t have to follow the crowd. If she wants ‘less is more,’ toned-down makeup, great! If she wants stage makeup that’s loud and glitzy, more power to you. Why? Because the key here is that she’s glamorizing herself the way she desires.

The same goes for jewelry. Some women prefer to wear dangly earrings with an accompanying necklace and bracelet, while others just want one of the three. Obviously, the hairstyle should be planned with that same mindset. But, of course, if she’s wearing a dress with a high neckline, we do suggest she keeps some of her hair out of her face.

Wedding bells should be retired to a form of expression only. This tradition is now pointless. You don’t have to keep a lookout for a venue with bells simply so you can hear them jingle. Traditional Christianity claims that bells ward off evil spirits.

There are people who genuinely enjoy the sounds made by bells and therefore want them to make a feature during their ceremony. For the rest of the audience, it’s a miss. You don’t want to give those prone to migraine a bad start to the event. Perhaps try decorative bells to be on the safer side?

Engagement rings don’t have to feature a diamond. Yes, they are the standard for some people, but not all. Not everyone is fond of this sparkly stone or can afford one, and that’s completely fine. Do you have a knack for bright red rubies? Or maybe ocean blue sapphires? Go for them!

You don’t need age-old traditions telling you what to do with your money and pretty fingers. The fact that some people think the size of the diamond determines the love between the couple is just disturbing. Money doesn’t buy emotions. Well, certainly not long-lasting ones.

Unlike jewelry, dresses are something that’s generally not passed down to further generations. Your grandmother may not want you to wear her incredibly beautiful vintage wedding dress on your big day simply because she believes it to be bad luck.

Orthodox traditions suggest wearing a “pre-worn” outfit on your day brings a lifetime of misery and poverty. But, in actuality, buying a secondhand wedding dress saves a lot of money and is environmentally friendly. Besides, many historical figures have tied the knot in their ancestor’s clothes and stayed in happy, long marriages.

In ancient wedding history, throwing rice at the newly-weds is said to bring them fertility and prosperity. But again, if we break it down into realistic terms, it just creates an annoying mess that will need to be cleaned up by someone. If not, it will get eaten by birds which is actually dangerous.

Eating rice makes them expand in the stomach and can even lead to fatalities. That certainly doesn’t symbolize prosperity, so perhaps it’s best to put this whole custom to bed. If guests really feel the need to throw something, they can toss some extra cash towards the couple’s wedding gift.

Who doesn’t like presents? However, you have to consider the fact that most of the time, when two adults tie the knot, they have what they need. In the 21st-century, couples start living together way before marriage, so chances are they already own common household items like crockery and silverware.

You could just give cash as your wedding gift. It offers the newlyweds an opportunity to cover some of the absorbent wedding costs, including the honeymoon. Knowing that your gift really helped a couple get their dream first vacation as a married partner sounds like a great idea.

Conventional wedding traditions have a lot of prejudiced aspects to them, but the garter toss deserves a special mention. Traditionally speaking, the groom is supposed to reach under his bride’s dress to find her lingerie and then fling the garter into a crowd of other men.

To make the situation worse, the bachelor who catches it is then supposed to find a“lucky” bachelorette to wear it. Like really, who came up with this nonsense? Catching the bouquet seems less inappropriate next to this.

There shouldn’t be mandatory speeches based on someone’s gender role. As woke as that sounds, it’s true. Perhaps the “best woman” wants to make the toast and prefers public speaking over her male counterpart. On top of that, nobody should be pressured to do something just because tradition says so.

The wedding speeches should be sentimental, light-hearted, and joyous. Not forced, awkward, and presentation. So try to see speeches as a choice rather than the bridal party members’ obligation.

We aren’t opposed to the concept of grooms and brides enjoying a night of relaxation before the big (and stressful) day. However, we do not condone the idea that it’s their “final night of freedom.” Treating marriage like it’s shackle-binding just doesn’t fly.

If you regret leaving your bachelor or bachelorette days behind, perhaps you aren’t prepared for the commitment that is marriage. Go out, rejoice, but try not to indulge too much in foreign pleasures simply because you think you “deserve” one last night of wildness.

Anyone who has sat down and gone through traditional wedding vows would know how messed up some of them sound. For example, phrases like asking for the bride to agree to “serve and obey” her future husband.

Additionally, there are others that “command” the bride to “submit to” and “seek to please” her spouse. Please, can we update these with 21st-century eyes and morals? Writing your vows should be a meaningful, personal and beautiful process where you get to express your love for each other.

Considering the content on this list, we understand the hypocrisy of mentioning this next one. However, the point of what the Redditor is trying to say is that we shouldn’t criticize or judge other people’s decisions on how they want to celebrate their wedding.

Whether they want a 500-person, over-the-top reception or a small and intimate garden ceremony. Each to their own, right? And if you love and respect the couple, then chances are you’ll very much enjoy their wedding. Ultimately, it’s a symbol of their eternal love.